3 months ago: Milo starts sleeping in between my pillow & the headboard.

2 month ago: Milo starts sleeping with his head on the pillow.

1 month ago: Milo starts fully sleeping on the pillow, he gets half, I get half.

2 nights ago: A coup d’etat “he decides to shove me off the pillow¦for an HOUR we go back and forth, I push him to his side, he slides over to mine. Finally, I realize I’m bigger and stronger, pull the pillow out and readjust it¦I get half, he gets half¦wake up and realize I’m sleeping at a weird 45 degree angle¦I twist around and see that Milo’s basically pushed me to the edge of the bed and he’s sleeping”SOUNDLY”in the middle of my pillow.

This morning: Wake up to find Milo basically sleeping on my head (his head is on mine)¦

Y’know, I remember a time when my life had dignity and a smidgen of sophistication¦now, I’m just a dog pillow. Literally.