Originally posted Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. It’s been eight months since my last confession. I’ve tried to be good, Father, really I have. I didn’t mouth off the lady who cut me off in traffic, I’ve given to the poor and needy, and when FOX unveiled their fall line-up, I didn’t lose hope in humanity.

But Father, I’m only human. And though I’ve tried to walk the righteous path, I’ve failed. Lust, Father. Lust and desire. My heart has been inflamed by sinful wants and needs. I tried to resist, Father. Really, I did. I averted my eyes from temptation, but the need Father, God help me the overwhelming need. I couldn’t fight it.

Not that I’m excusing my sin. I know what I’ve done is wrong. Sinful and wrong. Forgive me Father. I’ve hidden these secret desires from my helpmate. I’m so ashamed, Father. So very ashamed¦as soon as he left this morning, I gave into my vice¦

Yes, Father, I went to Safeway and I bought Special K and marshmallows. And I came home and made Rice Krispie Squares. I’m so humiliated Father, I can hardly bear to tell you that I didn’t even wait. I started eating them right out of the pot. And once they were in the dish, my desires overwhelmed me.

My hands are sticky with the evidence of my shame, my lips are lined with bits of marshmallow and I burned my fingers¦how many Hail Marys do I need to do, Father? And can you throw in some extra, cause I just finished the pan and I’m going to make some more¦